Oh yeah, this is the one movie where...nothing memorable happens. Here are my thoughts on Star Trek: Insurrection.
For the most part, I have been writing all the Star Trek reviews off the top of my memory. Sure, there's some information I had to fact check to make sure I presented it correctly, but as far as the movie goes, I remember the plot and elements of each movie fairly well. Not only that, but every movie has something memorable that's made it stick out. Yes, even the atrocious Final Frontier is memorable, definitely for the wrong reasons, but it's memorable nonetheless. But for the life of me, I do not remember Star Trek: Insurrection (1998). I've definitely seen it, but I simply remember nothing. I know how I FEEL about the movie and I remember certain parts, but I don't remember the plot or what the purpose of the movie is at all. I remember F. Murray Abraham portrays the villain. I remember Donna Murphy plays Picard's love interest. I remember Riker and Troi, who have been a couple in the past, rekindle their romance. I remember Geordi regains his eyesight and doesn't need his iconic ocular implants. I remember the movie playing out like a long episode rather than a movie. I also remember the movie being BORING. So here's the plot that I looked up (thanks Wikipedia): The crew of the Enterprise stumble upon a Federation conspiracy, spearheaded by Admiral Dougherty, against the inhabitants of a peaceful and unique planet. After learning that Dougherty has teamed up with the Son'a, led by Ahdar Ru'afo (F. Murray Abraham), to steal the planet's rejuvenating powers, Picard and crew start a rebellion with the Ba'ku against Starfleet. There's also a romantic subplot between Picard and a Ba'ku woman named Anij (Donna Murphy). So...this movie exists. Nothing about it sticks out to me. There's not really a whole lot to talk about in this one. None of the characters really do much. Yes, the planet does affect some of the crew, like Riker and Troi rekindling their relationship and Geordi regaining his eyesight, and to be fair, these are lasting effects that don't go away after this movie. But there's nothing substantial about this movie. It's just there. Some of the problems that I recall include the fact that the movie feels like a long episode rather than a full cinematic experience. While the story isn't awful (but it is forgettable), it doesn't feel like a movie. It feels like a two parter from the show that they slapped together and called a movie. Another problem is that, other than Picard and maybe Data and Riker, no one really DOES anything. The rest of the crew is just there, acting as glorified background characters. What I always liked about TNG was that everyone played an important role. From Dr. Crusher to Worf to Troi, everyone had something to do. But I didn't feel that way about this movie. I don't remember Crusher doing a damn thing honestly. This movie also suffers from being incredibly boring. It moves at a snails pace and the story bogs down with forgettable and unnecessary side plots. From what I remember, this movie is unmemorable and uneventful. There are events that do affect the characters in future installments (really just one more movie), but other than that, this movie is pretty skippable. Such a shame too, as director Jonathan Frakes had just delivered one of the best Trek films with First Contact. Alas, Star Trek: Insurrection doesn't bring anything new to the franchise nor does anything about this movie linger for any point or time in my cranium. Also I think Worf gets acne in this movie? I might have made that up. Rating: 3/10
0 Comments
If Wrath of Khan didn't exist, this would by far be the best Star Trek film. Here are my thoughts on Star Trek: First Contact.
Star Trek: The Next Generation is, in my humble opinion, one of the greatest shows, not only in the Star Trek universe, but of all time. Sure, the first two seasons aren't the greatest, but there are gems in there. The show pushed important real-life issues to the forefront and tackled difficult themes and topics that hadn't been covered in the original series. It showed the human flaws in an imperfect universe. It had some incredible acting, particularly from Patrick Stewart as the bold yet compassionate Jean-Luc Picard. Not only that, but it practically invented the dramatic cliffhanger in the season 3 finale with "The Best of Both Worlds, Pt. 1" when Picard becomes assimilated by the Borg, an antagonistic hive mind of drones linked to "the Collective". Picard, now Locutus of Borg, spews words of doom (the iconic "Resistance is futile") in front of the Enterprise, to which Commander Riker, left with no other choice, says "Mr. Worf...fire". Although we know that Picard is going to be fine, people back in 1990 had no idea what was going to happen and had to wait the entire summer to see the second part. The perfect cliffhanger. So for Star Trek: First Contact (1996), writers Brannon Braga and Ronald D. Moore, producer Rick Berman, and first-time director Jonathan Frakes decided to mix the two elements that made past movies so successful: time travel and old adversaries, which in this case would be the Borg. The plot: the crew of the Enterprise-E travel back in time from the 24th century to 2063 to stop the Borg from conquering Earth and preventing Zefram Cochrane's historic warp drive flight, which resulted in the first alien contact. All the while, Data gets kidnapped by the Borg, the crew must deal with Cochrane's perpetual reluctance to do the flight, and Picard has to handle Cochrane's feisty assistant Lily and his nightmares about being with the Borg. The Borg are the biggest foes for Picard just as Khan was for Kirk. What works is that the Borg are much bigger than just a normal adversary for Picard. The Borg show no emotion whey they destroy and assimilate. They show no remorse or any sort of humanistic qualities. They have no personal identity. They are one. They are a collective. The Borg Queen, however, does show a little more depth than the rest of her drones, but she is still as cold and unfeeling as the rest of the Borg. Just as Kirk had hatred for the Klingons, Picard has even more for the Borg, and rightfully so. He WAS part of the Borg and as such still has some sort of connection to them. The movie even begins with Picard having a nightmare about the Borg, something that has been plaguing him since his assimilation. Picard takes on the role of Captain Ahab, seeking revenge on the Borg, his Moby Dick, willing to do anything to destroy them. As stated before, bringing back the Borg, an old enemy, as the villains against Picard and the Enterprise proves to be a success. What Frakes does with Picard in this movie is so impressive. Even in the toughest of times, Picard is usually composed and methodical. But in this case, Picard is so bent on revenge that he's willing to do anything to destroy the Borg, EXCEPT destroy the Enterprise. Picard has never been a desperate man, at least never to the point where he's reached the point of no return. But in this movie he does. He reaches his tipping point, simmering with anger and letting it get the best of him. Picard is one of the most cherished characters in the entire franchise, and Frakes allows him to be a man that has reached his absolute breaking point, taking his anger and frustration out on his crew. He even goes as far as to call Worf a coward, which should've honestly killed him, but Worf even states "if you were any other man, I would kill you where you stand", signifying just how much respect Worf has for Picard. The scene where Lily confronts Picard-"Captain Ahab has to hunt his whale"-is the climax of this breaking point, with Picard losing his cool and destroying the glass case (This is the best scene in the movie by the way, with powerhouses Stewart and Alfre Woodard just absolutely killing it). Although Picard did show emotion in the last movie, it was something that had already been done before in a much more effective manner. This movie shows a much different of Picard, something that had never been seen in the show, which is an impressive feat done brilliantly by the first time director. The acting in this movie is by far the strongest in the Next Gen movies. Patrick Stewart is brilliant as always as Picard. The rest of the crew does well, although Brent Spiner, who sometimes has a bad habit of overdoing things, is particularly great as Data in this one. The rest of the supporting cast is extremely effective, probably the best of all the Next Gen movies. James Cromwell, who is ALWAYS good, is fantastic as the curmudgeonly Cochrane. Woodard, who is also ALWAYS good, shines as Lily Sloane, Cochrane's assistant. Alice Krige portrays the Borg Queen with conniving conviction. The story is presented well with perfect pacing. The writing is some of the strongest in the entire franchise. On top of that, there are so many great moments to choose from. The battle scene in the beginning is one of the best starship battle scenes in the franchise. Worf, in true Klingon warrior fashion, exclaims "it IS a good day to die" while flying the Defiant in battle (great DS9 reference!). The spacewalk fight scene with the Borg on the outside of the Enterprise is nothing short of breathtaking. Literally any scene with Cromwell as Cochrane or Woodard as Lily is downright splendid. Seeing fan favorites make short appearances like Barclay (Dwight Schultz) and the Emergency Medical Hologram (the top notch Robert Picardo) is a nice touch. Data, having been seduced and tempted with a life-changing human experience, states he had been considering the Borg Queen's offer for "0.68 seconds, sir", which doesn't seem like much, but it's an eternity in Data's time. This is a great Star Trek film. It has the perfect sci-fi touch, but it also has phenomenal performances, great writing, drama, humor, emotion, and action. It also just has a simply magical feeling, especially when Cochrane makes his warp drive flight for the first time. As a result of this, he makes first contact with the Vulcans. It's truly what makes Star Trek what it is and it befits the spirit of what Gene Roddenberry wanted: a grand vision of what the future of mankind should be, peacefully uniting with other civilizations and cultures and becoming one. While the next two movies wouldn't even come close to matching this one's greatness, Star Trek: First Contact proves to be a fun and emotional ride that solidifies its place amongst the greats. Also, man, Patrick Stewart looks GREAT in this film. Just saying. Rating: 10/10 There's that age old question: which captain is better, Picard or Kirk? Well, rather than answering that question, this movie decides to have them team up together, even if it's only for like 5 lackluster minutes. Here are my thoughts on Star Trek: Generations. Warning: MAJOR spoilers ahead.
1994 was a busy year for Star Trek. Star Trek: The Next Generation was wrapping up its seventh and final season, Deep Space Nine was finishing its second season, and the first Next Gen movie was released on November 18, 1994. That movie was Star Trek: Generations. The plot: Captain Jean-Luc Picard and his crew must stop Tolian Soran (Malcolm McDowell) from opening a portal to the Nexus, a mysterious realm that can allow anyone to experience anything they want. All the while, Picard enters the Nexus and finds one Captain James T. Kirk, who has been there for 78 years after disappearing off of the Enterprise. Once this happens, the two team up for the ultimate showdown against Soran. Well, not quite ultimate. One of the biggest problems with this movie is that it advertises this huge showdown that will include two of the biggest heroes in the Star Trek franchise, which, in my opinion, it doesn't live up to. Picard doesn't meet up with Kirk until about 20 minutes from the movie's finish. While the scene where Picard meets Kirk in the Nexus is incredibly well acted, once we get to the fight against Soran on Veridian III, it's over in like 5 minutes. So...in an almost two hour where the biggest hype surrounds the partnership between Kirk and Picard, it lasts 5 minutes. It ends up being a wasted opportunity that the franchise should've used to deliver something that could've been really special. The final fight scene ends up being a bore and it concludes with one of the most unsatisfying and disappointing deaths in the entire franchise. So how does the great Captain James T. Kirk perish? By fighting on the Enterprise and dying on the bridge? By going out in a blaze of glory like his beloved Enterprise did in Search for Spock? Nope. He dies under a pile of rubble from a collapsed bridge. I know this might not seem like a huge deal, but it's an insulting way for Kirk to go, someone who I've idolized since I was 11 years old. He doesn't even get a decent burial, not that he could due to the condition of the Enterprise at that time. Either way, it really bothers me. Sure, he does help save the day, as he usually does, but it's not enough for me. I didn't watch this movie until I was in my 20's, and I remember thinking that this was an incredibly disappointing and unsatisfying end for James T. Kirk. Unlike movies like Wrath of Khan, I don't feel like this is a movie that you can just jump into. If you want to watch this movie, you probably need to watch at least some of the series, at least to get some of the context. There are many references to the show, including Data's human chip, Picard's family, and the Klingon sisters. While it may not be too hard to comprehend these elements, it would make more sense if one were to watch the series first. (Honestly this could be said for the next three movies as well). Speaking of those references, there are many things that bother me about this movie. First of all, the Duras sisters Lursa and B'Etor, two of the worst characters from the series in my opinion, are just there to be nuisances for the Enterprise (and for me). The Data's human chip side plot is executed poorly and Brent Spiner overacts to the point where it's embarrassing. Picard's family, whom we met for the first and only time in season 4 of TNG, is wiped out in a fire, which I understand is supposed to show Picard's emotional side (and that particular does showcase an incredible performance from Patrick Stewart), but I plain don't like it. There's no rationale behind it. I just hate it. I hate the fact that Picard is truly alone now, even though he realizes that he's not really "alone" by the end. But there's no one else to carry his name. I know it's supposed to be a theme and all, and it's not executed poorly or sloppily. It's just something I don't like. There are some really cool things to marvel at in this movie though. Anytime Guinan is on the screen, her mysterious presence is alluring and a welcoming sight. Whoopi Goldberg, who once upon a time was a decent actress (just watch The Color Purple or Ghost), lights up the screen whenever she's there and her scenes with Patrick Stewart are fantastic. The Enterprise crash on Veridian III scene is one of the most exciting scenes in the entire franchise. The whole scene is built up with exhilarating intensity and thrill, leading to the destruction of once again another Enterprise. It's honestly the best scene in the entire film. The beginning scene with Kirk, Chekov, and Scotty on the Enterprise-B is also a highlight, letting the old crew save the day once again and officially bridging the original series with TNG (even though we already saw Scotty in TNG). Overall, this movie is just...kinda there. Yes, it's the first big movie with the Next Gen cast, but it doesn't do anything for me personally. The acting is great, especially from Stewart, Goldberg, and McDowell, but the story is all over the place and the tone is inconsistent, especially with the Data's human chip sub plot present. The main storyline is intriguing, but it isn't executed as well as it could have been and the script is rough. Luckily, this isn't the worst Next Gen movie, but Star Trek: Generations disappoints by not living up to the hype that it had been advertising: a great showdown with two great heroes that ends up being no more than a blip on the radar. Rating: 5.4/10 One of the darker movies in the franchise, but it serves as a grand finale and farewell for the original crew of the Enterprise. Here are my thoughts on Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.
In 1966, it would've been impossible to predict that Star Trek would have as far reaching of an influence as it would by 1991. It also would've been impossible to predict that the original crew of the Enterprise would have garnered 6 films to their name. One of those films is really boring (TMP). One of those films is a bonafide sci-fi classic (TWOK). One of those films corrects everything that happened in that bonafide sci-fi classic (SOS). One of those films has whales (VH). One of those films is really bad (FF). And one of those films serves as the best finale possible for the crew, complete with a murder mystery and a great villainous performance from Christopher Plummer. That movie would be Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991). After the disastrous Final Frontier, Paramount executives knew that it was time to get someone who had great success with the franchise. So they rehired Nicholas Meyer, director of the excellent Wrath of Khan, to direct and co-write Undiscovered Country. Meyer aimed for a darker and more militaristic tone than most of the other Trek films and decided to make a film that outlined the flaws of this idealistic future. He wanted to make a film that showed that bigotry and racism can still exist, even in a romanticized utopian future. However, Gene Roddenberry didn't care for the script or the story and fought against Meyer and producer Ralph Winter at every chance he could. Regardless of his influence and ill health at that point, the producers and the studio ultimately ignored Roddenberry and the film was put into production. Roddenberry would die only days after the film's premiere. The plot in a nutshell: after the destruction of the Klingon moon Praxis (the movie literally starts off with a bang), the Klingon Empire decides to open peace talks with their long-time adversaries the Federation. People from both sides vehemently oppose these peace negotiations, including Captain Kirk, who is still reeling from the death of his son David, killed by a Klingon. Much to Kirk's dismay, Spock volunteers the Enterprise to escort Klingon High Chancellor Gorkon to the peace talks along with the rest of his entourage, including his daughter and General Chang (Christopher Plummer). After a tense dinner party on the Enterprise, Gorkon is assassinated aboard his ship, leading the Klingons to believe that Kirk had planned it. When Kirk and McCoy are arrested, it is up to Spock and the rest of the Enterprise to clear Kirk's name and uncover the conspirators before it's too late. What I've always liked about Star Trek are the carefully crafted stories and how they're told. The story of TUC essentially plays out like a whodunnit murder mystery, with the crew of the Enterprise having to search for clues in order to solve the mystery of Gorkon's murder. The suspense builds as the crew try to piece the mystery together, racing against the conspirators and ultimately against time. It adds intrigue and excitement to the movie and it's something that none of the other movies have ever done. It's essentially a science fiction version of an Agatha Christie novel, with Spock and Kirk each taking the role of Hercule Poirot. The story wonderfully explores one of the most relatable themes in human consciousness: the concept of change. Just like in the movie, there are many people in the world who react negatively to change and resist it, clinging to their old ways of life and refusing to see the positive differences that change could make. Many of the Federation and Klingon officials are bigoted against each other, choosing to stay that way and refusing to change, ultimately leading to Gorkon's death. Even Kirk resists change at first, telling Spock to "let them [the Klingons] die". Positive change does end up being the result, but only after overcoming resistance and hostility from both sides. This theme of change is tackled in a modernistic sense, allowing people to relate to the topic no matter what year it is. In fact, this theme seems more relevant (and more necessary) than ever in this day and age. The movie shows that, no matter when and where you may be, change is always present and always necessary, even in the 23rd century. The special effects look significantly better in this movie than they did in Final Frontier, which honestly wasn't hard to do considering the production costs were slashed in FF. The zero gravity scenes on the Klingon ship look particularly cool. Admittedly, some of the computer generated visual effects look rough and outdated (like the suspended Klingon blood), but considering it was 1991, I can give it a pass. The starship battle scenes do look great though, again improving on FF's shortcomings. Also, the music from Cliff Eidelman is fantastic, delivering a score that superbly meshes the dark tones of Igor Stravinsky, the suspenseful sounds of Bernard Herrmann, and, of course, the Star Trek spirit. The acting is phenomenal. Once again, each crew member is given their moment to shine, notably Sulu commanding his own ship (the Excelsior, the same ship that Scotty sabotaged in SOS), and Chekov's interrogation scene, complete with a gleeful Russian reference. However, the show stealers are the supporting cast: David Warner as the regal Gorkon, Kim Cattrell as the calculating Valeris, Iman as the sultry Martia, and Christopher Plummer as the villainous General Chang. Plummer is the film's MVP, portraying Chang as a cold yet fiery Klingon general who has a militaristic agenda and an affinity for spewing Shakespeare (it should be noted that the title of the movie is actually from Hamlet). While he isn't Khan, he does end up being a worthy foe for Kirk, an opponent with a cold warrior spirit that's seemingly one step ahead of Kirk at every turn. Also, it's great to see Grace Lee Whitney back as Janice Rand, this time the communications officer aboard the Excelsior. I know she was TECHNICALLY in three of the previous movies, but it's great to see her nonetheless. There are a couple of moments in this movie that are questionable, as in, why were they put in the movie in the first place. The first moment is when the Enterprise is entering Klingon space. Uhura and the crew are scrambling to flip through old Klingon books to talk to the drunk Klingon border guards so they can disguise themselves and get through, creating a moment of "comedy". First of all, it's not funny. I know in the new Star Trek movies Uhura is depicted as a brilliant linguist, and I'm not sure if Uhura was ever portrayed as such in the original series. Either way, shouldn't she know like...a little bit? I know the Klingons and the Federation were enemies and all, but to me, it would behoove the Federation to require Uhura and people in her position to know at least enough Klingon to get by. This bit just portrays the crew as a bunch of buffoons, fumbling around and trying to get through the language barrier like a group of out of place tourists. The next moment is when Kirk is fighting the shape shifter Martia. At one point in the fight, Kirk says to Martia-Kirk "I can't believe I kissed you", to which she answers "must've been your lifelong ambition". At first glance, this moment is groan worthy, delivered with an overbearing swagger of pompousness. However, I can also see this as Shatner parodying himself. Kirk has always been seen as the big hero and Shatner portrays him as an almost godlike entity. So in this mindset, this scene is perfect, allowing Shatner to make fun of his own performance as Kirk. Either way, the scene is questionable but at the same time brilliantly clever. Lastly, and most importantly, this is the last movie for the entire original Enterprise crew. This is the grand finale, as the Enterprise is called in to be decommissioned at the very end of the movie. The movie ends with Spock saying they can "go to Hell" and Kirk calling Chekov to go to the "second star to the right, and straight on til morning" (a quote from Peter Pan). Soon after, the credits start to roll, with the cast member's signatures appearing over the star-filled background. It's the perfect farewell and send-off to the crew of the original Enterprise. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country ends the journey with a fast-paced and well executed story filled with great acting, suspense, intrigue, and excitement. Well, there's also that scene where Kirk kicks that guy in the knees, which end up being his balls, but you know, at least he's not killing a three-boobed cat stripper... Rating: 9.7/10 An incompetent illogical nonsensical mess. Here are my thoughts on Star Trek V: The Final Frontier.
While not all of the Star Trek movies are fantastic, each movie has some sort of redeeming quality or genuinely cool scene that makes me go "wow". Except for one. As you can guess, that one is Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (1989). Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner had a "favored nations clause", which stated that whatever Nimoy received, so would Shatner. In this case, Nimoy had directed the last two movies, which meant that Shatner could direct the next movie. Nimoy did a great job directing the last two films, showing a keen eye for acting, story, comedy, and the overall understanding of how the Star Trek universe works. William Shatner, on the other hand, did an awful awful job with Final Frontier. Granted, some things were out of his control, including a writer's strike which delayed production and lower production costs which resulted in shoddier looking special effects. However, there were multiple production problems that stemmed from Shatner's stubborn attitude and constant arguments with co-writers Harve Bennett and David Loughery regarding elements and the overall tone of the story. It also didn't help that some of the cast, primarily DeForrest Kelley and Nimoy, asked for revisions of the story so it could fit their needs. The plot in a nutshell: Spock's half-brother Sybok hijacks the Enterprise to visit Sha Ka Ree, a mythical planet that supposedly houses God. Sybok, who is a full-blooded Vulcan unlike Spock, has a unique ability that allows him to feel and heal other peoples' pain through use of the mind meld, which enables him to heavily persuade them to do his bidding for him. Through this ability, he's able to gather a cult-like following, brainwash the crew of the Enterprise, and easily take over the ship. Oh, and there's a hotshot Klingon commander pursuing the Enterprise for self-fulfilling and personal glory as well. There's also a hostage rescue mission in there too. In honesty, this plot should not have failed like it did. It certainly sounds like a Star Trek story, much more so than Voyage Home. But there's something that Voyage Home did well that Final Frontier failed at at every level. Voyage Home succeeded in that it applied humor in a way that helped elevate the movie. It never went overboard nor did it ever feel unwelcome. Not only that, but the humor was one of the focal points of the entire movie. It was executed extremely well by director Leonard Nimoy and the entire cast. Shatner thought that it would be a good idea to continue that trend of making humor the focal point, except none of the humor in Final Frontier is funny at all. So why isn't this movie funny? That is a great question. To answer that, I am going to run a bullet list of moments that illustrates just how unfunny this movie is: 1. The whole scene of Scotty breaking out Kirk, Spock, and McCoy from the brig plays out like a poorly made Three Strooges bit. 2. Scotty says "I know this ship like I know the back of my hand" and then precedes to hit his head on one of the bulkheads, knocking himself out. CLASSIC comedy. 3. Sulu and Chekov get lost in the woods. Get it, it's funny because they're the helmsman and navigator and they got LOST in the woods. It's IRONIC. 4. Spock's rocket boots. Because they thought it would be FUNNY for Spock to have a pair of ROCKET BOOTS. 5. The whole camping trip scene, complete with a sing-along. A SING-ALONG in a Star Trek movie. 6. Spock telling Kirk ("not in front of the Klingons") not to hug him because it would be embarrassing to do so in front of the Klingons. What a laugh riot. 7. Sulu and Chekov looking at a female Klingon's tush and actively pursuing it but then having to stop because Klaa is glaring at them. Knee slapper. 8. Kirk and McCoy climbing on Spock and his damned rocket boots, sinking first because they're three heavy grown men, but once Spock turns on the boosters, they blast off. Brilliant. But to REALLY illustrate just how bad this movie is, here are some of the lowest moments: 1. SPOCK VULCAN NECK PINCHES A HORSE. A. HORSE. 2. Kirk and crew coming in guns blazing for the hostage rescue mission like it's a cheesy wild west shootout. 3. Kirk kills a three-boobed cat stripper. Nope you didn't read that wrong. 4. Scotty and Uhura are a couple. This was never alluded to during the series at all, nor is it ever mentioned again in the future. Just...why? 5. Uhura performs a striptease to distract the guards on their hostage rescue mission, to which she says "I've always wanted to play to a captive audience". Hard pass. 6. Spock neck pinches...a HORSE. 7. A sequence where we see Spock being born in what appears to be a cave straight from caveman times and then Sarek hissing "he's so...human". Literally no. 8. Kirk hammily shouting "so it's me you want, you Klingon bastards!" at the poorly rendered Klingon ship approaching him. It's laughably bad. 9. After being beamed up by the Klingons, Kirk thanks the Klingons for saving him, only for the chair to turn around and reveal that it was Spock all along. Even though it had been made clear that Spock was responsible from the scene before. So...not a surprise at all. 10. Did I mention that Spock NECK PINCHES A HORSE? There are also tired tropes that are unfortunately present in this film. Like how the Enterprise is once again the ONLY ship in the quadrant available to go on this hostage rescue mission, even though there are probably plenty of other ships in the area, but nope, it HAS to be the Enterprise. Or how Kirk is played out as the big hero and everyone else has to worship the ground he walks on. While this trope has been present but not a HUGE issue in the past, it's cranked up to 11 in this movie, portraying Kirk as an untouchable godlike figure who is the absolute good. He HAS to feel his pain. He HAS to be the one to question "God". He HAS to climb a rock at Yosemite to show how BIG of a man he is. Or how the Enterprise is inconveniently broken in a time of need, because of course it is. The biggest problem is more than William Shatner failing to understand what made the franchise successful, which is odd because he definitely should've known better considering he's seen what made it successful. It's more than William Shatner failing to make a good Star Trek movie. It's that William Shatner didn't make a good movie at all. Nothing in the movie works. The story moves so slow. The acting is AWFUL, especially on Shatner's part. The humor never lands. The dialogue is so poorly written, which could be chalked up to the writer's strike, but even still, I'm not giving it a pass. The special effects and "action" scenes are laughably bad. Every character EXCEPT for Kirk acts like a bumbling idiot. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier is quite possibly the worst movie I've ever seen, primarily because of how it fails on every level as a Star Trek movie AND as a movie as a whole. But hey, can't say that there's another movie where Kirk kills a three-boobed cat stripper. Fun fact: Sybok was originally supposed to be played by Sean Connery, but instead we got Laurence Luckinbill. Man, if only... Rating: 0/10 Bottom of the Barrel |
AuthorBuster Bigelow: 30 year old lover of movies, cinema, and music. Whether you agree or disagree with my reviews, I'd love to hear what you think in the comments! Archives
June 2020
Categories
All
|
"Every great film should seem new every time you see it."
-Roger Ebert
Copyright © 2015